WALKING IN THE GARDEN WITH GOD

MY PERFECT LIFE The vessel that God gave me to live in was designed specifically with me in mind. He knew beforehand that I would abuse it…that I would not appreciate its limitations, so he made it strong and durable, capable of holding up under unrelenting conditions. It was tailor-made to fit me like a glove. My experiences have been my soul’s longings to fill the parameters of my vessel. When I look back, I can see that my life has been perfect. Now, when I say perfect…I don’t mean perfect in the sense of how we think of our Lord and Savior. That kind of perfection relates to being spiritually mature, and I am far from that. And I don’t mean perfect in the sense that there haven’t been challenges, setbacks, and disappointments, for there have been. Lots and lots of them. I have gone through plenty of rough patches on this road called life, where it seemed that everything that could go wrong, did. Some of the rough patches were of my own making, for sure. There were times when I drove my life fast and hard until the wheels finally came off. Even then, it didn’t stop me…I drove on the rims, determined to live on my own terms. I have broken rules and boundaries, rocked the boat, gone where others dared not go, and loved every minute. Am I sorry? Do I have regrets? No. Do I wish I could go back and live my life differently? No. I have lived long enough to realize that my messy, complicated, over-the-top life, which at times made no sense to me or anyone else, unfolded as it was meant to. While some take the tried-and-true way through life…I always chose the scenic route. I have to believe that I evolved and got to where I am today because it was God’s will for my life, or he wouldn’t have allowed it. My life has been perfect, in the sense that I have learned the lessons I was meant to learn. I did it my way…and with God’s blessing. Of course, when you live in the fast lane, there always comes a day of reckoning. The money runs out or your health goes south. You get tired of going against the grain…tired of chasing a good time. You get to a point where you don’t want to do…you just want to be. You grow up. You find Jesus. Finding Jesus has been my greatest accomplishment in life. It too, was God’s will. I could not, NOT find him, as my spirit was bent in that direction, and it was only a matter of time before I discovered what had always been missing. Now, finding the Lord did not negate the experiences of my past. When I took up my cross and decided to follow the Lord, I brought the lessons I learned with me, for they were a necessary part of my soul’s blueprint. Each experience…each lesson…has been invaluable…each contributing to the person I am becoming. When I started my journey down the Road to Glory…I began gaining new insight and wisdom about who I am as a spiritual being, and who I am to God. I discovered that while to others, and even to myself, I may not look or act perfect…to God, I am perfect for his purposes. He has always had a plan, and though I don’t understand the significance of the part I play in it…he does. While much of my life was spent walking along to the beat of my own drum, never giving God a thought…the same cannot be said of him. I was always on his mind. He followed my progress and knew every step and misstep I took. He saw the opportunities squandered, the urgings of my spirit ignored, the rebellion going on within my spirit for control. From day one he knew that I would eventually come to see that I was part of a bigger picture. He knew how long it would take…when it would happen…and that I would run myself ragged exploring all my options until I finally concluded that I needed him in my life. I am so grateful for the long, winding road I have traveled. It hasn’t always been easy being me…but I can see now that my life has been unfolding perfectly, in God's time and according to his plan.