Every family unit functions within the boundaries of its own unique belief system. That system consists of a core set of beliefs and values that serve as a powerful dynamic that shapes and guides the thinking and behavior patterns of family members. Sometimes the belief system is openly articulated, but more often than not, it is passed on from generation to generation through the attitudes and actions that are modeled by parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and so on.
One of the subsets of a family belief system is the posture it takes on metaphysical issues. Do we, or do we not, believe in God, live by the Ten Commandments, pray, think there’s a heaven and hell, and/or subscribe to an organized religion or faith group? The family’s belief system might include, also, beliefs about how the world began, where we came from, why we’re here, and what happens to us when we die. A family’s answers to questions of this type provide guideposts that help establish the theoretical structure for a child’s start in life—one’s ontological launch pad, if you will.
When a child reaches adulthood, it is generally accepted that the family metaphysical beliefs will follow him or her through life. We hear words to that effect not infrequently. “That’s what I was taught as a kid and that’s the way I’ll always see it.” “My beliefs are very personal to me, and I don’t appreciate it when people question them.” “You have your beliefs and I have mine.” “I don’t question my beliefs, since that’s the way my family has always thought.” “Don’t try to change my beliefs and I won’t try to change yours.” It is understandable that people cling to their beliefs in this way. After all, we made it through our formative years with them, so the uncon-scious assumption is that we need to stay true to our beliefs in order to survive. The result is that these beliefs tend to burrow into the core of one’s being where they calcify over time.
The trouble is, a person adamantly convinced of the truth value of his or her beliefs is a person impervious to reason. Or, in the vernacular, “don’t confuse me with the facts; my mind is already made up.” This stance may give one a feeling of comfort and stability. But the world at large is exponentially different than the small world that exists within a family unit. Hence, abstract be-liefs that served us well in childhood don’t necessarily benefit us as adults. Conflicts over clash-ing beliefs are rampant at every level of life. While disputes between theists and atheists don’t yet rise to the magnitude of global consequence (except for politically driven skirmishes between countries with vastly different theologies, in time they may well do so as the Christian population continues to shrink and atheism continues to grow. In the meantime, the theist/atheist impasse most certainly creates dissension and division at multiple societal levels—person to person, spouse to spouse, partner to partner, family to family, neighbor to neighbor, colleague to col-league, group to group, and so on.