The Code of I Am

Chapter 4: An UNCOMMON conversation with the VOICE OF TRUTH: At 11 am on March 12th, 2018, the following day, I went paddle boarding in the middle of the lake to speak and pray to God. I was angry at God. I was so angry and had mixed feelings that God didn't rescue my son. I smacked the lake water with my paddle, screamed, and had an uncommon conversation with God in the middle of the lake. I was very angry with how the unexpected tragedy that was happening in my family's life: Me: "God, you rescued me before when I tried to commit suicide when I was young. And how come you didn't rescue my son?!!! Why?!!!!” God: "Eleanora, what if I told you that your son signed up for this? And what have you learned from the life he had created? What did that teach you?” Me: "I don't understand." Then, I paused for a moment, and tears was running down my cheek while I was looking over at our house. I continued to say, "God, I know that I should not ask for signs, but to learn to trust in you. But this time, I truly felt I needed one sign of peace. Please, give me a sign. I just want to know if my son made peace with you, please!!!” Then, God spoke into my heart with a small still gentle voice and whispered in my right ear. Then everything felt like it paused within the wrinkle of time in less than a Nanosecond, and felt like being in the presence of God again. Then, God gently said: "What do you want, Eleanora? What sign?” Me: I would like a blue feather, please. Just a symbol that his soul made peace with you. Because I remember him saying when he was alive and was angry at something and said that he would rather go to hell than believe in God.” God: "What if he doesn't want to give you a blue feather? Would you still accept it if it isn't blue? Me: "Yes, I would still accept it. I don't care what color as long it is a feather as a sign that his soul made peace with you”. For a moment there, this conversation with God (the Voice of Truth) made me think that it sounded like what my oldest son would say if he was still alive talking to me because he loved to negotiate all the time in some of our conversations when he was still living. So, I thought God was saying what my oldest son wanted to say to me. Then, I felt my late son was standing beside God. I felt deep down in my heart their energies by seeing through my mind's eye. I felt God was telling me what my late son wanted to tell me about my request for feathers. And I continued to ask God and said, "God, how would I know that this is not just me talking to myself and making my kind of peace or justifying my kind of peace?” God: "Eleanora, your son is with me. He made peace with me.” I started to feel the emotion of loss and grief more and more and I was in tears when I heard God whisper again that my late son made peace with our Divine Creator. God: "Close your eyes and I will show you where he is.” So, I closed my eyes and meditated. I saw a vivid vision of my son. I cried more and felt the goosebumps all over me. This is what I saw in my mind's eye: My oldest late son was wearing his black t-shirt and blue jeans as usual, but this time he had angel wings and the color was light grayish white. Then, I saw a blue aura around him and his angelic wings with blue sparkly bubbles of light like fireflies floating gently surrounding him with the loving grace of God.” That was Monday, March 12 at 11 am in the middle of the lake with an uncommon conversation between God and my late son, and it was immensely memorable. On Wednesday, March 14th, just before my husband and I left our home to go for a meeting at school to meet the principal school teachers and fellow grade 9 classmates, I was putting my boots on by our entrance door inside our house and I saw a grey angel feather on the floor appeared out of nowhere. I picked it up and started crying and I knew God sent me a symbol as a sign that my late son made peace with God. I used to be very skeptical about this angel feather thing, and it happened to me ever since. I showed the feather to my husband and he smiled. Then I showed it to my daughter, one of the twins, Estefania. I asked her what kind of feather it was. She grabbed her bird book dictionary and said, "Mum, it is either a seagull, Sea as in sea cadets, or a mourning dove feather. Do you get it, mum? But it is most likely a mourning dove. Get it, mom?! We are in mourning right now.” I kept the feather in my wallet as a sign of peace symbol that my son is okay and made peace with God. I also believe that my late son can still experience love from God in a spiritual realm, even though he didn't know how to let love in nor love himself during his earthly lifetime. God still forgives and loves my son, and he has served his purpose on earth. I was still learning the unlearning my religion believing that there is hell as it has been taught me since childhood. That is why I asked the Voice of truth if my son made it to heaven and found love with peace in his heart.