Career Enlighten

“What does it take to reach a point where I’m truly happy and fulfilled? To do a job I love, that excites me, and that uses my full potential? To reach the level I deserve, I’m ready for, and be paid for what I’m actually worth? To feel alive and connected?” A new client came to me with these questions. They were keeping her awake every night. Have you ever felt this way? You’re not alone. I was there once too. A few days ago, I was being interviewed and recalled sitting in a meeting room in Basel, Switzerland, with the global Executive Talent Development team of one of the top-three Pharma companies worldwide. We discussed the new strategies to implement worldwide to accelerate our talent pipeline to meet the high-demanding business needs, commercial speed, and the aggressive product pipeline the corporation had envisioned for the next five years. I had achieved a highly desirable position that many people would love to have, but paradoxically, a part of me wasn’t pleased. It shocked me when I realized it. I was in a great place, yet this inner voice was yearning for something more. It was annoying! I had not listened to this deep, subtle calling for many years. In some ways, the great job, the brand-new car, the beautiful house, the fantastic daughter, and the family were not enough. How was it even possible? Don’t get me wrong. I struggled a lot for a long time to get everything I had. There were times when it wasn’t easy or fun at all. Then, why wasn’t it making me happy? The battle was supposed to be over. All those years, I’d tried to thrive in the corporate game and turn the competition, conflicts, and hidden agendas over to get a better role. All the time, I saw others being promoted and hired for the jobs I longed for and how I remained invisible even though I was ready and exceeded the expected results. How frustrating it was for me. Remember feeling devastated. The social pressure, my perfectionism disguised as “high standards,” seeing others living and enjoying what I wanted making me feel like a failure, wholly inadequate, impotent, and furious. I was angry with myself, with companies, and with the world. Why wasn’t I capable of achieving what I wanted and was working on getting? Why didn’t people value and recognize my ideas? Why didn’t companies fulfill their promises? Why didn’t they see and honor my results, effort, and commitment? What was I doing wrong? I had a rough time trying to pay my mortgage and buy the car other colleagues were driving. I almost lost my house and my car on two different occasions. Living in an apartment far away from downtown, I had to spend more than three hours commuting daily in a giant megalopolis. Waking up at 5:00 am for a late-night type of person like me was hell, every day, I woke up cursing at life. I strumbled to keep pace with my peers’ executive lifestyles. Still, I didn’t understand how easy it seemed for them to have great outfits, cars, vacations, houses, and even hobbies I could only dream about. It was depressing, but the worst part was that it was so discouraging that it made me doubt my capacity, values, and myself. My head seemed to run between hundreds of questions with no answer: Why is it that others are earning much more, even when my results are much better? How do I make them see and recognize me for everything I am and do? Why are people with less potential and experience in better jobs? Why are others getting the promotions, the roles, and the visibility I am eager to have?