Talk To Me

Hugsy has the reputation of being an outlaw, yet I could get her to do things that no one else would dream of trying. So, in search of the something that was missing and someone who could set things right, I went to a third trainer. This trainer had a good reputation and a successful career in the horse world. I was sure this trainer could help me. The first thing we did to "correct the problem" was put the horse in draw reins and put spurs on my feet. Same philosophy that the other trainers used, slightly different method, same results, and it just was not working for me or my horse. I could not figure out why I was working so hard with knowledgeable people and making no progress. My stable owner recommended that I try working with Jon Mallory. I hadn't really heard much about him, didn't know what his training methods were, but I thought why not, one last chance. "Fair, Firm, and Friendly", were the first words I heard Jon say. As a teacher of high school students, that's how I deal with the kids in my classroom; why didn't I think about doing that with my horse? Nothing I had been taught to do was in the least bit friendly. I certainly wasn't being fair. I was not firm, I was downright harsh. During my first lesson, Jon tried to tell me that I had to approach my horse with a different attitude. I kept asking what training aid and what bit he thought I needed to go buy. Jon had his work cut out for him. Our first lesson could be categorized as a disaster. I choose to call it a turning point. I could not get Hugsy to walk forward for more than ten steps at a time. When I asked her to trot, she would at first refuse. Take off like a shot. Then stop dead and put her head down to eat, almost pulling me out of the saddle. At the canter she would take the bit in her teeth, stick her nose in the air and charge, drop her head, and buck. She pulled every trick in the book. It was the worst ride I ever had. The only problem Jon saw with my horse was that she was soured on life. Hugsy wasn't enjoying herself. She had no reason to cooperate with me. I had to learn how to listen to and communicate with Hugsy. This was a trainer who wasn't going to fix my problem horse, he was going to fix my approach and philosophy, and the horse would follow suit. Hope springs eternal. The first thing I had to understand was that "might does not make right", especially when a 120 pound girl was going up against a 1,200 animal. Good point; I lose automatically. Hugsy was trying to tell me this in her own way - temper tantrums. The bits, spurs, draw reins, an crops were all tools of "might makes right". I had to learn to stop relying on these tools, which went hand in hand with step one; I had to lighten up and relax. I had learned to be tense and be ready for anything and to keep constant contact with her mouth. As Jon pointed out, if I danced with a partner that constantly tried to push me around the dance floor, didn't speak to me in a respectful manner, and was not concerned about my comfort level or if I was enjoying myself, I would refuse a second dance. When you dance,, you want a partner who is relaxed, gently guides you, shows respect, and is attentive to you. It is fun and something you look forward to doing again. Riding is a lot like dancing. Horses are sensitive creatures and can be gently guided. If they can feel a fly land on their body, they can feel the gentle pressure of the leg or the subtle shifting of their rider's weight. When you learn the language that your horse uses and actually listen to what she is telling you the communication starts. If you expect the horse to listen to you, then you have to listen to the horse. When you learn to communicate to your horse that you will always be fair, firm, and friendly, you will get a horse that is willing to be your partner.