The Secret Sauce of Loving Relationships

Relationships

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We can only be as good in a relationship as we are in ourselves. Many issues in relationships are a reflection of the difficulties we experience as individuals.

It is important to learn and grow as an individual because that is what you’re bringing into the relationship. You are bringing knowledge, life lessons and understandings about yourself which adds great value to the relationship.

We all learn and grow and develop and I don’t think we ever get to a point where we know too much about anything.

A person with poor sense of self tries to change the other person in order to change their life because they really don’t know how to change themselves.

How well do you know yourself? I mean really know yourself?

The most important thing in a relationship is to have a good understanding of your true self. Everyone has something to bring to the relationship. What is it that you are bringing?

Are you bringing in a good understanding of what you like and what you dislike? Do you have a set of values and standards that are working for you? Do you find it easy to make life decisions and do you have positive beliefs of yourself and life in general?

The more information you know and understand about yourself the easier it is to make things work in the relationship. You need to know the differences and similarities between you and others so you can recognize it when you are in a relationship.

The more you know and the more you share, the less conflict you will attract. Even more so, when you do have conflict in the relationship, because you have such a good understanding of yourself you can explain your thoughts, feelings and differences because you know what they are!

It makes it so much easier than going into a relationship not having a clue about yourself and having to learn as you go that the differences between you and your partner are something you just can’t deal with or cope with. It is easy to say this now but if you didn’t start you relationship with a good understanding of yourself it is never too late to get to know yourself on a deeper level and share this journey with your partner and vice versa.

Some people do fear the worst when they see their partner going through a personal growth stage in their life and fear they will be left behind. It is always a good idea to talk with your partner and share what you are learning along the way.

When two people enter a relationship they are bringing a lot of stuff with them about their upbringing, culture, religion or spirituality, friendships, traumas, careers, achievements, failures and perhaps baggage from past relationships.

Relationships shouldn’t be hard work but they should include consistent effort from both partners to make it a great one.

You can consider your relationship to be in 3 parts:

One part is you. You are able to make all the difference in the relationship based on your actions and reactions. If you can be accountable for yourself and how you behave in the relationship we are half way to an awesome relationship already.