My Dragonfly
And the Lessons He Taught Me
by
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I can truly say that I never had a fear of death. I didn't think about it much, but when I did death did not seem like finality to me. I have always had a fear that I would lose a child and I prayed faithfully that that would never happen. Although I have lost a son, I can't really say that my prayers were not answered. I lost my son for a specific reason and it had to do with one of the learning experiences that I came to this Earth to live through and learn from, not to mention the lessons he learned. This experience is the reason that I am writing this book. I will tell you about that day, the day my world crashed and I knew that I could never survive, but I did. I lost a huge part of my heart that day, but I survived and I am a much stronger person now. My gifts, which were hidden at this time, were about to spring into action, after the bout with my grief. Let me begin first by saying, if I thought the year 2005 was stressful, the year 2012 was horrible. It didn’t start until late February of 2012 when I received a phone call from my oldest son telling me that my great nephew was found dead. He died from a drug overdose. This kid wasn’t 21 years old yet. My heart was breaking not only for my niece who was his mother, but also for my sister-in-law, his grandmother, whom I know was very close to him. Yet, the only thing I could do for any of them was pray, and that’s what I did. I could sympathize since I was a mother and a grandmother also. Things went back to normal for me and then in late August of 2012 I received another phone call from my daughter. She was recently divorced and she called to tell me that her ex-husbands son died. She felt close to him, she was his stepmother for a short time. This guy was only in his mid-twenties. Of course, we went to the services; they still felt like family to us. I didn’t know what to say to his dad, and I didn’t even know his mother, so I just took her hand and said something I thought was comforting. I couldn’t believe that we lost two young people in a matter of months. I prayed that God would send them comfort, but I had no idea how much they were actually hurting until a couple of weeks later. They say that things happen in threes, but I never expected what happened nest. September 2, 2012, a beautiful, sunny Sunday morning. The next day was Labor Day, the unofficial end of summer. My children had all married and moved out of our family home, except for one son. My fourth child, Walter, had been living with us for the past 13 months. It was on this day, my husband and I were at home watching some television program. Walt had spent the night at a cousin’s house, or so I thought. I knew that he had to go to work that day and I was worrying that he would be late to his job. At approximately 9:20 in the morning I saw my daughter, Karin, pull into our driveway and just thought it was strange seeing her this early on a Sunday. As I looked through my living room window, I could see the steps leading to the front door and she was not alone. Instant fear gripped me and I think I knew then that something was drastically wrong. As I opened the door, my oldest son, Bob, stepped into the house and said, “mom, sit down,” I immediately said, NO! I guess I thought if I didn't sit down, he wouldn't tell me what he had to say. Then those awful words came out of his mouth, “He's dead.” All I remember then was hearing screams, the world stopped spinning and I could hear screams from every corner of my world. I wasn't aware that it was me who was screaming. The screaming seemed to go on in my head for hours. That was how the “worst day of my life” began.
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About the Book
Family, relationships, loss, and grief
Dealing with changes throughout life in our own way, through faith and spirituality
When you lose a child, the world stands still. The birds no longer sing, the sun no longer shines. You feel as though you are alone, even in a room full of people. Grief is a terrible five-letter word. It ’s easier to climb a mountain than to get past grief unscathed. Kathy deals with the grief and with the loss that was the cause of the grief. She has learned to live with the grief but under her terms. It is her passionate hope this book can shed some light on the ways that you can conquer grief, kick it to the curb, and create a new life filled with love, peace, and joy.
Kathy and her husband have been married since 1970. They have raised five children: a police officer, a fireman, a master plumber, and an accountant. One son is in spirit. They have five grandchildren and one great-grandson.
My Dragonfly
My Dragonfly represents the son they lost to drug addiction in September of 2012. Kathy has written My Dragonfly to help others who have lost children, to let them know that their life matters, and to help them find the healing they need to feel whole again. If this book helps just one person or one mother who has lost a child, then it was well worth writing.
Learning to live a conscious life has helped Kathy to move toward her goals of manifesting her true life path and helping others who may be searching for meaning in their lives.
About the Author
When you lose a child, the world stands still. The birds no longer sing, the sun no longer shines. You feel as though you are alone, even in a room full of people. Grief is a terrible five-letter word. It’s easier to climb a mountain than to get past grief unscathed. Kathy deals with the grief and with the loss that was the cause of the grief. She has learned to live with the grief but under her terms. It is her passionate hope this book can shed some light on the ways that you can conquer grief, kick it to the curb, and create a new life filled with love, peace, and joy.
Kathy and her husband have been married for forty-five years. They have raised five children: a police officer, a fireman, a master plumber, and an accountant. One son is in spirit. They have five grandchildren and one great-grandson.
My Dragonfly represents the son Kathy lost to drug addiction and what his visits in spirit have taught her. He passed away in September 2012. Kathy lives in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, but no matter where you live today, it seems like drugs are readily available to anyone. Kathy grieved for over a year and doesn’t remember anything about that year. She knows that grief can play havoc in anyone’s life. We never get over the grief. We learn to live with the experiences, and what those experiences teach us.
Learning to live a conscious life has helped Kathy to move toward her goal of manifesting her true life’s path and helping others who may be searching for meaning in their lives. Each morning when she awakes, she is grateful for another beautiful day. Kathy makes time every day for prayer and meditation; they work wonders. She lives and teaches conscious living through the laws of attraction.